Patience & Trust

Does anyone really enjoy learning patience? I think not. At least I don't believe I've ever heard anyone say that's a process they enjoy. The Bible is pretty clear that learning to wait on God is a good thing, and I know that what it says is true, but still...the whole waiting thing: it's just generally not fun. I guess that waiting on God is as much about trusting that His timing is best as it is about patience. But trust is another one of those virtues that's also not much fun to have to learn. Having said this, I have to mention that one of the best ways to learn both of these things is to go through the process of adopting a child.

You'd think that having adopted Matani more than a year ago that I'd have this whole thing down pat. Not so. If anything, I'm finding the wait even more difficult this time. Perhaps it's because there are many more unknowns this time around, as this is the first time my agency has worked in the DRC. Perhaps it's because Matani walks around all the time now, talking about "Taiya" (yes, her K sound generally comes out more like a T). Perhaps it's because there is absolutely nothing I can do to hurry this process along at all. I know for certain that some of my anxiousness comes from the fact that no real progress has been made for about a month and a half now. It's not that anything's wrong, or that anyone is slacking...it's just that it's another country, another culture, and things work differently. Timelines are difficult to nail down. Necessary paperwork is sometimes difficult to obtain. Right now, there's one more document that has to be generated for Mikaiya before the lawyer can request a birth certificate for her. And our case can't be submitted to court in the DRC until that birth certificate is in hand. And like I said, there's nothing I can do to speed this up. No phone calls to be made; no letters to be written; no money to be paid. I'm not the only one enduring this wait. There are 3-4 other familes adopting through CCI who at exactly the same place as I am in the process. And we are all in a place where there is nothing we can do except...except what? Except put our trust, our hope, our questions, our fears in the hands of the all-powerful, all-knowing, everywhere-present Creator of the universe; the One who is a self-described Father to the fatherless, who defends the cause of the orphan, sets the lonely in families, and who lays upon His people the mandate to care for orphans. Wow...when putting it that way, it seems a little silly that I get so anxious about this, doesn't it? Forgive me, Lord, when I forget that Your hands are big enough to do this job; that your arm is long enough to reach Mikaiya where she sleeps night after night in an orphanage; and that Your love for her is greater than mine could ever even hope to be. And Lord, as I learn to wait patiently on You, I continue to ask that Your timing for her homecoming will be quick...that my daughter will sleep in my arms soon, just as she sleeps in Yours now.